1. Didja accidentally blow through the whole, "We're using our real names" thing on registration? No problem, just send me (Mike) a Conversation message and I'll get you sorted, by which I mean hammered-into-obedient-line because I'm SO about having a lot of individuality-destroying, oppressive shit all over my forum.
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  2. You're only as good as the harshest criticism you're willing to hear.
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My baptism of fire

Discussion in 'Critique & Feedback' started by Leo Borruso, Jun 15, 2020.

  1. Hi everyone, in the end, I've decided to do it.
    I'm ready for your evaluation, keeping in the account I am a complete autodidact, but obsessed with music...
    So after a hundred yoga sessions... at my signal unleash hell.

    :). GOOOOOOOOO!

     
    Sylvain Provenzano likes this.
  2. The orchestration is a mess. Here's how you fix it. Start by performing the two-handed, playable piano version of this piece. You don't have enough hands to play all the parts you put down, so you'll be forced to play the ones that matter, in the way they matter. Everything you added on top of that was probably a mistake. But we'll deal with it. Start there.
     
  3. Ok, I will work on it. Thank you Mike.
     
  4. Hi everybody. Ok, Mike,
    I have silenced everything (I hope) I'm no so able to transcribe on my two-handed piano version.
    P.S. this is a mix so, you must probably push up your volume amp.



    Thanks in advance for your precious support.
     
  5. He Leo

    Do you have a piano?

    I certainly cannot speak for Mike, but in the spirit of help in case English is not your native tongue. (I am so impressed with how many people from
    overseas post around here. It's really amazing. I only speak English. Well, even that is questionable by some)

    Mike wrote:


    This is really meant to be done with your own hands. The recording is not important. The computer is going to do what ever you program it to do.
    The physical connect is going to force you to make decisions about your piece. The connection you have with the instrument will also help
    with the "control" of your craft.

    Below is your first 5 bars. Are you able to create something like this?
    View attachment upload_2020-6-17_23-6-18.png
    View attachment upload_2020-6-17_23-6-30.png

    For example: those harp harmonics might be irrelevant for your playable version. Then make a decision those are decorations, and play only
    the flute (which has stems down on the treble clef), and the harp (bass clef music).


    The other thing I am a big fan of is studying music that deals with similar issues so you can see how some composers handled their material.
    For example you might make a connection that the repeating triplets reminds you of the opening movement to the moonlight sonata or something.

    Since you have a solo sustaining instrument I am going to suggest this as a piece to listen to. In general I think you can modulate, or push the harmony in more ways that you currently do.

    I hope this is of help, and if not you at least enjoy 3 minutes of beautiful music below.

    With best wishes

    Doug

     
  6. #6 Leo Borruso, Jun 28, 2020 at 1:07 PM
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2020 at 4:08 PM
    Hi everyone, hi Mike and Doug.
    Sorry for being late, but I was very busy because of work (engineer).
    This version for piano is not complete, indeed. The final is still missing.
    I still have to transcribe all the score (in pdf format), but I'll do it when I'll have finished everything and I will link it here.
    Here it is.



    @Doug
    - it's true my native language is not English, so I apologize for the mistakes I've already made and for what I will do.
    - no, I don't have a piano, but only a small midi controller, and a lot of patience.
    - I love Saint-Saƫns, so thank you for your musical suggestion.
     

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