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Crossing the Event Horizon Theme

Discussion in 'Critique & Feedback' started by Duncan Formosa, Dec 29, 2019.

  1. #1 Duncan Formosa, Dec 29, 2019
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2020
    [EDIT]

    After months of trying to get any free time to work on this piece, I've finally got to a point where I think I've made some progress. It's not quite finished yet, still think that there are a few things missing that I'm trying to figure out, but I'd love to hear some opinions. Hopefully it's starting to show some potential!






    Hi All,

    So I'm very new to writing music for film (I'm a film and TV editor full time) and I'm trying to get into scoring music whenever I have time.

    Here is a piece I wrote a few years ago for my college film (It's one of the few pieces I've had time to finish.) I would love to hear what you all think in terms of melody, structure etc and how the orchestration could be improved.



    Thanks!
    Duncan
     
  2. Hey Duncan,

    Welcome to this forum!

    I am just a beginner, so please take my advice with a grain of salt. There are a lot of people here which can give you way better advice than I can.

    But here it goes:
    Overall everything in your piece is loud and epic from the beginning. Try next time to build to epicness with contrast.
    At 0:13, when you repeat your initial idea I feel like it should change in some way, since the basic idea is so simple. You are basically repeating the idea with different chords 4 times before. For me it feels like we are ready for some slight alterations after the first 4 bars.
    I like the melody which comes in at 0:23, but I think you could have done a lot more with it in terms of development.

    So lets try something development wise:


    I took your melody, stated it twice and started developing it. This is by no means better than what you did, but should illustrate what else you can do with this melody.
    And as I said earlier, take it with a grain of salt, since I'm just a beginner. This example might be flawed as hell :D

    Hope it helps.
     
  3. Hi Michael,

    Glad to hear from you!

    I totally agree that the piece doesn't have much development (I wrote this nearly 5 years ago so I had a feeling it would need a lot of work.) Always meant to go back to it but never had anyone to give feedback on the original. I'm quite fond of the main theme so I want to try and take it a bit further.

    Since it's supposed to have a sort of space/ adventure kind of vibe I have some ideas on how to build-up to the "epic" part. Was thinking a drone on some sort of pad with a distant-sounding piano playing the stripped-down version of the main theme. Same thing with the string part at the beginning, just have it slowly swell and build into the main theme and then see where I can go from there.

    Will try and get out a piano sketch and hopefully get some feedback to see if the direction is any good.

    I'm not really musically trained so I apologise if my descriptions aren't the best haha.

    Thanks for your help!
     
    Michael Lückgen likes this.
  4. Hey Duncan, good job on this.

    Melody is simple and clear, which I think is good thing as there's a lot of potential there to develop it more if you so desire.

    Structure wise, since it's only a 49 second track it's hard to comment on. I would just say to avoid what I'm sure most new composers who've found Redbanned and Mike Verta's work are trying to avoid (that of the endless repeating, copy paste, and stacking...what's been called 'vertical development'). I could see that being a temptation with an "epic" style piece such as this, but if you tried to continue expanding the idea, modulating, etc, I think it would be much more interesting and definitely help you to grow your creative chops. Unfortunately, this is the hard work, but it's always more rewarding.

    Orchestration wise, I like that you haven't gone as overboard as you could have done with the instrumentation you chose, but I do think that if you started smaller, as Micheal mentioned above, and used even less, you would have more to build with later on. It's always difficult to be minimalist when it comes to orchestration, especially with an idea in this style, but it can be done. A favorite example of Verta's which is now a favorite of mine is the main title track from Tombstone by Bruce Broughton, sparse, but so epic.
     
    Duncan Formosa and Doug Gibson like this.
  5. Finally got round to sketching this out on the piano. Hopefully this is a step in the right direction before I start orchestrating it.

     
    Michael Lückgen likes this.
  6. Hi duncan, nice piece overall! I don't think it *needs* further development necessarily, because it's very short, but you could keep this in mind in future projects. Orchestration-wise, I found the first melody a bit thin with a single violin line, I'd double it in octaves maybe. Also, you repeat it verbatim, you could change the orchestration to add variety. As for the second melody, that kind of synth voice is a bit weird IMHO, esp. when it does thes portamento-like slides. If the first melody was a single line, maybe you could harmonize the second one a bit (e.g. 3rds and/or 6ths), so that it sounds thicker in comparison. Just throwing in some ideas
     
    Duncan Formosa likes this.
  7. #7 Duncan Formosa, Mar 5, 2020
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2020
    After months of trying to get any free time to work on this piece, I've finally got to a point where I think I've made some progress. It's not quite finished yet, still think that there are a few things missing that I'm trying to figure out, but I'd love to hear some opinions. Hopefully it's starting to show some potential!

     
    Michael Lückgen and Bjarke Tan like this.

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